Let’s pretend that we’re waltzing through the ballroom of an Elizabethan manor—corsets cinched tightly across bosoms and hands clutching layers of sheer fabric. Or perhaps it’s 1916 and you’re daydreaming about your honey coming home from the front line—imagining the quickening of each breath as you hold each other. It could even be 1974, and you’ve just arrived at your Aunt Martha’s house for the whole summer, lamenting over how you won’t be seeing your sweetie for three entire months. What choice do you have but to pen word after word of careful and adoring prose for your darling?

While it may seem rather archaic in today’s technological world, the effort and intimacy that goes into a handwritten (or typed) love letter will not go unnoticed by your partner, and writing down your affections is a great way to reflect on how wonderful, sexy, and special that person is for you.

Love notes don’t need to be Shakespearean sonnets, but they’re a nice way to come right out and say how you feel about your love. Whether you want to write a steamy description of everything you’d like to do when you get home from work tonight, a list of all the reasons you’re happy to be with someone, or a heartfelt note reminiscing about the joys you’ve experienced with your partner over the years, this guide will help you get started.

This guide is split up into three styles of notes to get you started, but most of the tips and tricks will be helpful regardless of what type of letter you’re trying to write.

Naughty and Oh So Nice

Oh baby, if you want to get him hot and bothered, details are key. Sexy love notes are a really fun way to get your partner turned on and thinking of you, and he can keep the naughty gift to read over and over.

When you’re writing any type of personal letter, you want to try to have a conversational tone—there’s no need to be formal—so reading what you’ve written out loud is an easy way to see if it sounds like normal speech or not. Starting by telling why you wanted to write a letter is a good way to begin naturally, and you can transition into the descriptions from there.

i.e. “Hey honeybun, I’m sitting at work and I can’t stop thinking about last night, so I wanted to write you a little note telling you about all my favorite parts…”

Once you get into the meat of the note, don’t be afraid to be specific about what exactly is so sexy about what your partner does, or what sexy things you want to do. Here are some example sentences:

I love the way your hands move so slowly/quickly/roughly down my inner thigh/hips/back…

I want to kiss from your jaw to your belly button and then…

Let me wrap my legs/arms around your hips/shoulders as you pull of my shirt/bra…

Something to remember is that as the author of this note, you are creating the voice behind it, and you can be as tasteful or as provocative as you’re comfortable with.

Sentence Starters:

I love how you…
Remember when I…
When you do (sexy thing), it makes me feel…
I want to/you to…
I like it when…

Check out the word banks below for ideas of different words you can use to mix things up:

Hot Grammar Tip: Don’t forget that most adjectives can be changed into adverbs like softly, slowly, and roughly!

Steamy Tip: While you’re perfectly welcome to use bold terms like penis, cock, dick, vagina, pussy, clit, etc, you can also allude to those areas without being as blatant. For example, instead of saying, I love when your dick is in my pussy, try, I love the way you feel inside me. Or rather than, I could feel your hard cock against me, you can say, I could feel how excited you were as my hand reached between your legs. This is not to say there’s anything wrong with the first sentences, but if you don’t ever speak that way, you may not feel comfortable writing that way either.

To finish up our tips for a smokin’ love note, here’s a brief example of a few lines:

…We climbed into the backseat of my car. I was wearing that silky yellow skirt with no panties, and Ain’t No Mountain High Enough was playing softly from the radio. I remember your lips tracing the length of my neck and the way our breathing seemed to match up. It was cramped so we decided to get out of the car, and you gently laid me down on my back across the hood. Your head was haloed by the light of the moon above you, and the car creaked beneath my shoulder blades…

Overall, just remember to have fun with it—your lover is going to enjoy whatever sexy little story you come up with!

Love Lists

Love lists are my favorite type of I love you to give to my partner, and I think they’re the easiest and most fun to write. Essentially, a love list is just a list of things/reasons/memories that you love about your dearest, but it’s not quite as simple as a numbered or bullet point list (though you can always make one of those too!). Think about Harry’s speech at the end of When Harry Met Sally, and that’s pretty much exactly it.

I generally pick a theme for a love list, so here are some possible themes:

Cute things your darling does without realizing
Plans for lots of things you want to do together in the future
Things that your cutie may not like about themselves that you love
As many inside jokes as you can think of
Your favorite memories of times that were especially funny/romantic/etc

Sometimes a love list will be embedded in a different sort of love letter, like a general note where you’re telling your honey how much you love and miss them, and you insert a list of things you miss about them, but love lists make really pleasant stand-alone notes too.

Love lists can also make fun sexy notes if you want to list some of your favorite lovemaking moments, or favorite things you do when getting it on. In general, they’re very versatile!

On to the examples! My love lists usually follow a structured form where I repeat the same few words for the beginning of each sentence in the list. The following example shows how you can make a hypothetical love list about things that haven’t even happened yet:

…I can’t wait to keep learning and growing with you by my side. Let’s pick some really exciting grad schools together. Let’s save money for a trip in the next six months. Let’s keep loving each other (not hard at all). Let’s find new jobs and think about new cities to set our goals on. Let’s not forget about the creative outlets that we’re passionate about. Let’s make some huge pots of soup. Let’s go to a nice restaurant and get a little dressed up. Let’s watch some movies. Let’s go visit my parents. Let’s go to Chicago this autumn. Let’s make some art together. I love you so much. Let’s get a puppy…

Love lists can be about so many things—they can really focus on a bigger picture, or they can be very specific. They can encourage growth, or they can reminisce about times past. Here’s another example of a love list that focuses on very specific details:

…You’re simply the loveliest person I know, which makes it especially convenient that I get to spend the rest of my life with you. I love you at 3:30 in the morning when I’m sticky because I’m so hot in our sweaty apartment, and despite my attempts to inch away from your warmth, you follow me across the bed and say “hi” and make kissy noises. I love you when you try to force me to share food with you, but then you finish it anyway. I love you when you tickle me and I crumble to a heap on the floor as a means to escape. I love you when you fall asleep for three hours in the afternoon and don’t text me back, and I know you’re fine, but I still worry anyway. I love you when you’re groggy after a nap and just want to hug. I love you when I wake up first and tell you that you should get up soon, but you’re naughty and still in bed when I get out of the shower. I love you when I forget to reply to a text and you ask how I’m doing because you got a little worried even though it’s only been twenty minutes. I love you in the morning when I have soft dreams of us making love and awaken to do just that—eyes closed as our mouths find each other for sleepy kisses. I love you when you tell me I’m soft...

Love lists are the best when they’re very specific details. They can be serious, romantic, funny—anything. They’re guaranteed to make your belovèd feel extra special, and it’s always easy to think of things that you adore.

Regular Ole’ Love Letters

For a general love letter, you can really write about whatever you’d like. These can get extremely sentimental and mushy, but really, what’s the point of writing any declaration of love that isn’t sentimental and mushy?

I generally encourage writing how you feel, and not being afraid to be too sappy or over-romantic—that’s the point! If you think about your lover all the time, write, I think about you all the time. Throw in those little specific details, but don’t fixate on making them perfect. I think if you’re going for a classic love letter, you should be as over-the-top as possible. Here’s an excerpt:

…I want to be near you every hour of the day, though I’m especially fond of the early mornings when we’re barely awake and full of sleepy kisses, whispered sighs, and peaceful breathing.

There’s no one else like you and the fact that I managed to find you and that I get to keep you, well, I’m honestly the luckiest girl in the world. I hope you never tire of my cliché declarations of love, because I’m so stuffed with them that if I don’t express them periodically, I will actually burst with all the love I have for you, you incredible, wonderful, lovely boy. I feel like the more I tell you, the more I want to tell you! I love you, I love you!

Gushy? Check! Ridiculously emotional? Check! Heartfelt? Absolutely. However, you’ll notice that of the three types of love notes that we’ve covered in the guide, this one is the least specific to either the writer or the receiver of the note. If you’d like to incorporate all three styles into one letter, all the better!

And of course, if you’re looking for the entire package, spend some time writing a few love notes, and book a Mod Bettie session to really knock your lover’s socks (and the rest of their clothes) off.